Have you tried all of the insomnia cures out there?
If the answer to any of these is yes then Flintoffs Ashes has the perfect answer for you!
Tune in to Sky TV and watch the current Test match between New Zealand and England. After watching 10 minutes of this turgid Test you’ll be sleeping like a baby!*
New Zealand versus England. It’s better than Mogadon!
* - We don’t mean that you’ll be shitting in your pants and waking up every two hours wanting to suckle on your mums tits.
Not posted anything for a while so it’s a bit of a shame that this is something of a rant aimed at another cricket blogger. Sorry about that. Will Photoshop Michael Vaughan as Wonder Woman later this week to make up for it.*
Anyway, I’ve just read an outrageous post over at Cricket 24×7. I’m shaking my head in disbelief at what Jagadish has written regarding the recent comments made by Matthew Hayden about Harbhajan Singh.
“It’s been a bit of a long battle with Harbhajan. The first time I ever met him he was the same little obnoxious weed that he is now,” stated Hayden.
He also said in the same radio interview that he’d like to get in a boxing ring with Ishant Sharma so I’m guessing that he was enjoying playing up to his bully boy role that he seems to have cultivated over the last few years (i.e. ever since he actually started to consistently score runs for Australia). The barrel chested Aussie opener is built like a brick shit house so I guess he feels he can get away with saying what he wants.
Personally I don’t like Matthew Hayden for all the reasons above (not least of all that consistent run scoring thing, particularly against England) but what has really got my goat is that Jagadish suggests that this comment is “obviously a case of racial stereotyping” and that it “very clearly qualifies as a racist statement”.
Obnoxious implies Harbhajan is annoying, offensive or disgustingly objectionable. Little refers to Harbhajan being smaller-built in comparison to Hayden (and the rest of his teammates). This is obviously a case of racial stereotyping, and hence vilification (just like Tony Greig’s “Those little Shri Lonkans” chant). Weed again refers to Harbhajan being obnoxious and detrimental.
Clearly this is a case of offensive and seriously insulting language. If someone tells me I’m a weed, I’d be pretty offended and feel insulted about it, since it implies that I shouldn’t be existing. Add in the ‘little’ part and this very clearly qualifies as a racist remark.
You can read the full article here but I genuinely can’t see how anyone can possibly believe that calling someone a “little weed” is in any way racially motivated. Maybe this is just a reaction to the recent Test and one day series and all of the associated..ahem..monkey business that went on there. Whatever the reasons, I actually found it quite sad that Jagadish has played the race card here.
What Hayden said wasn’t racist. It was just stupid.
Well England have been pretty woeful in the One Day series against New Zealand, haven’t they? Battered into submission by a fat bloke and a guy that reminds me of Tom Hanks in Saving Private Ryan. Dunno why. He just does.
So much for a team that former Black Cap Ian Smith described as being the best England one-day team he has seen in years. I’m just wondering just how much cricket Smith has been able to watch in between rifling the pie shops of Wellington.
I really can’t see how England can fight their way back into the series. From what I’ve seen we look like a team all out of sorts and lacking leadership. I’ve got nothing against Paul Collingwood - some of my best friends are gingers - but I don’t see him as an inspirational leader. Maybe I’m wrong but I don’t think I’ll be taking up Totesports generous 9/2 on England to win the series.
Still, at least Lord Fred is on his way back. Peter Moores seems to think that Flintoff will be back to something close to his best after his fourth ankle operation. Let’s hope so, eh? Putting his cricket performance to one side for a second, this England team is woefully short of anyone you’d put your money on to beat Jesse Ryder in a yard of ale contest.
Anyway, I’m going to be moving Flintoffs Ashes to a new server over the next couple of days so if you happen to pop by and find everything has gone Pete Tong, you’ll know the reason why.
OK so despite telling the world that I’m back in love with cricket, I’ve still single handedly failed to post anything of any note in the last week so rather than come up with anything of my own, here’s a video made by The Atheist over at AYALAC.
Ermm..I still love cricket, by the way. Does that help at all?
You might just have noticed that I haven’t really been posting anything on the site for the last few months. Don’t worry, I haven’t been affected by any kind of mystery virus that meant my hands fell off or anything. It was just that…well…how can I put it?
I fell out of love with cricket
I don’t know at what point it happened but I’m guessing, as I suggested at the time, it was during the farcical World Cup. Whereas for the previous 30+ years of my life I could sit and watch cricket for hours, I found myself bored of watching the Australians dominate everything and England being pants. Even watching the potentially brilliant Pakistan or the sublime batting line up of the Indians failed to get me going.
Maybe it’s a sign of the modern game but I found most Test matches to be entirely predictable and I started to find the constant cheating gamesmanship of the sides rather distasteful. That and the fact that Bob Willis really gets on my tits.
Nothing much has changed in the last couple of weeks - England are still pants and Australia keep winning - but for some reason I’m back in love with cricket again. Maybe it’s all the monkey business going on in Australia at the moment. Maybe it’s because the new English season is now only a few short months away. Maybe it’s because Lord Freddie is due to make his comeback any time soon.
Whatever the reason let us rejoice and say yea verily at the top of our lungs. Go on. I dare you. Stand up in the middle of your office and shout “Yea Verily”. Bonus points awarded for anyone who videos it and slaps it on YouTube.
Power up the Photoshop, Scotty. There’s a cricketer out there somewhere who needs to be humiliated.
