England Win A Test Match

Ryan Sidebottom in his delivery stride

Hurrah! It’s been a long time coming but England have won a Test match for the first time since THAT game at The Oval and this time we didn’t need Darrell Hair. Instead we won it with a bowler with lots of hair.

I’m seeing a pattern developing here. England could do worse than calling up Chewbacca and Cousin It for the next Test.

My prediction that KP would post a big one came true in this match with his double hundred. Sadly it didn’t help me with my bet but there you go…

Talking of my betting prowess, I had another shocker this weekend. I’d put a wee wager on the football play offs and had Bristol Rovers, Yeovil Town and West Bromwich Albion in a treble. I really need to give up. Either that or offer an alternative tip service where people pay me to tell them what I’m backing and then put money on the complete opposite.

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The REAL Schofield Report

The Schofield Report was designed to improve English cricket by looking at the failings of the last 5 years and provide suggestions on how to move the game of cricket forward. If you haven’t seen it yet then there’s a nice summary over at The Corridor for you to have a look at.

The problem is that the media released version is so wishy washy. It doesn’t really say anything new. It just covers the same old ground. Too much cricket being played. International tours are draining. Balance of power. Yada yada yada.

Well there’s a reason behind this and, in a worldwide exclusive, Flintoffs Ashes can reveal the shocking truth behind the Schofield report.

It’s been doctored and we have the proof!

In time honoured tradition, the crusty old farts at the MCC and ECB have swept the truth under the carpet in order to maintain their control at the helm of English cricket. They didn’t want this document to ever see the light of day but we’ve managed to get hold of the REAL Schofield Report.

the shocking truth behind English cricket and their attempt to cover up the real Schofield report

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Sidebottom Gets The Nod

Sidebottom gets his chance for England against the West Indies

Left arm seamer Ryan Sidebottom is the surprise inclusion in the England squad for the second Test versus the West Indies. The Nottinghmashire seamer hasn’t played for England since 2001 and comes into the squad in place of the unfortunate Owais Shah.

I’ve not seen much of him but, from what I hear, he plays a mean ukulele.

England squad for second Test v West Indies
Michael Vaughan (captain), James Anderson, Ian Bell, Paul Collingwood, Alastair Cook, Andrew Flintoff, Steve Harmison, Kevin Pietersen, Matt Prior, Monty Panesar, Liam Plunkett, Ryan Sidebottom, Andrew Strauss

In other news, the fact that it has been blazing sun and beautiful blue skies since the umpires called it a day in the first Test is worthy of a place in an Alanis Morissette song. It’s not like ten thousand bloody spoons, let me tell you. It’s like a pain in the arse cuz I’ve lost my sodding bet.

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Balls

First Test ends in a draw thanks to the frickin’ rain. There goes my bet, then…

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Mustard And Onions Too Hot For Bears

Mustard and Onions

I don’t normally talk about the County Championship too much here on Flintoff’s Ashes. Mainly because it’s pretty dull stuff however I had to make mention of the Division One clash between Warwickshire and Durham.

Warwickshire were bowled out for 335 in their first innings with England hopeful Graham Onions picking up 8-101. 5 of his wickets were caught behind by wicket keeper Philip Mustard.

Sadly Arthur Side-Order-Of-Fries wasn’t playing.

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