Old Man McGrath

Glenn McGrath. Bless ‘im. Today he has gone on record as saying that he’ll be targeting Kevin Pieterson and suggesting that KP will throw his wicket away cheaply playing big shots.

Over the last few weeks Old Man McGrath has said that Australia will whitewash England 5-0 (just like last time, eh Glenn?), he’s branded Andrew Strauss and Alastair Cook as his bunnies and called Monty Panesar mental. Or words to that affect.

All together now, to the tune of “Go West” by the Village People:

You’re old and you smell of wee
You’re old and you smell of wee
You’re old and you smell of wee
You’re old and you smell of wee

Repeat to fade. Or arrest.

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Fletcher Out!

Geoffrey Boycott's marblesWell he would be if Geoffrey Boycott had anything to do with it. The former England opening batsman has suggested that it’s time for Duncan Fletcher to be removed as England coach according to his article in the Daily Telegraph.

Whilst I agree that England’s ODI form is awful, how can he possibly suggest that Fletcher should go after the transformation of the Test side from no hopers into the second best in the world? If England can retain the Ashes this Winter, they’ll be the best cricket team on the planet.

Geoffrey, I think you might be needing these as you’ve clearly lost your own.

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169

Hmmm….that was an interesting way of spending a Saturday morning. It was all looking so good as well. A collapse of Iver Heath standards and no mistake!

Let’s see if the boys can do something with the ball.

5PM UPDATE

Well that was pretty comprehensive! To be honest, Australia were miles ahead of England today and thoroughly deserved the victory. England got off to a good start with Strauss and Bell but after that they lost their way. After a quick burst of wickets, Damien Martyn was superb for Australia and he was unfortunate not to see it all the way through to the end.

What does it mean with regards the Ashes? Absolutely nothing, in my opinion. It would have been nice to pick up a win but, let’s be honest, England ODI form is woeful and has nothing to do with the way the Test team plays.

November 23. That’s when it matters.

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Barmy Army Hooligans?

I’ve just read over at the BBC Sport site that an Australian politician has written to Tony Blair requesting intelligence on “known sporting hooligans” prior to the Ashes series.

It seems that Morris Iemma, the Premier for New South Wales, is concerned that there is likely to be poor crowd behaviour at the matches which will “adversely impact the enjoyment of thousands of families who love cricket” and “reflect poorly on national reputations”.

He’s absolutely right, you know, although asking Tony Blair’s government for any kind of “intelligence” is like asking an Aussie for lessons in etiquette. Something has to be done about the lager swilling hooligans that will descend on Australian sporting venues over the coming months and Flintoffs Ashes has the answer.

Ban anyone with a mullet, a tache, a sister-wife or who refers to flip-flops as thongs. That should do the job.

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England win warm up

Michael Yardy

England comfortably beat a Rajasthan Cricket Association XI by 144 runs in their ICC Champions Trophy warm up match today.

Bell (53), Flintoff (59) and Dalrymple (79*) were the stars with the bat. Jimmy Anderson had a good return from injury picking up 2-29, ably assisted by Mahmood 3-22 and Dalrymple 2-29.

However the most pleasing thing for me was to see Michael Yardy scoring 44 and bowling a tight spell (1-17 off 6 overs). This should mean that he plays on Sunday against India. Fantastic! There’s something about the way Michael Holding says his name that makes me chuckle.

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